lesson learnedPosted: March 29, 2011
I have several tried and true methods for dealing with grumpiness, and one of the most reliable is visiting a bookstore. Today, in a state of mind I would call “surly”, I dropped in to my local favorite, hoping to remedy this problem. And it is with this backdrop that I give you today’s lesson in karma.
Upon my initial meandering around the store I noticed a woman, and by noticed I mean smelled, because this woman was very heavily perfumed with something floral. I immediately began searching for the cause of this olfactory assault so that I could escape it when I turned and noticed that the source of said assault was clutching Sarah Palin’s latest literary atrocity. At this point my instinct took over and I walked quickly to the opposite side of the store.
I wish the story had ended there, but alas it was not to be. Minutes later I stood inspecting the magazine section, and was reaching for the cover that featured Will & Kate (I can’t help it, I find them fascinating) when I was once again overtaken by the heavy scent of roses. As I turned to look for an exit I found myself trapped by the woman who exclaimed “Oh Will and Kate!”; and then, gaze drifting to my left hand “are you hoping to find ideas for your wedding dear!?” I felt compelled to identify that no, I was not in fact looking to the royal wedding for inspiration for my own, thank you. I gave her a very forced smile, turned to go, and then “oh but dear, have you picked your colors yet!?”
I couldn’t help it, I cracked. Under ordinary circumstances I would never have done it, but given my bad mood, and the fact that her perfume was making my eyes water, and that I had seen her holding a book by Sarah Palin five minutes prior, and that she thought I would get wedding inspiration from the royal family and that she didn’t know a thing about me but she wanted to know if I had picked my wedding colors!? (Mom you should probably stop reading here).
Smiling, I offered the most ridiculous thing I could think of at that moment: “Oh yes, I’m thinking of aubergine.” As the devil on my shoulder jumped up and down and the angel on the other side buried its face in its hands and my mother reading this thinks “how could she have turned out like this?” I prepared to walk away smug in my triumph over confounding the floral woman with my sarcastic answer. Because seriously, who really knows what the color “aubergine” is? (Side note: it’s eggplant, which is lovely, and much easier to say).
But the floral lady bested me. Her face lit up and she practically yelled to the whole store “oh dearrrrr but one of my daughter’s colors was aubergine and it’s beautifulllll and I’m forever talking to people who have no idea what it is! You should definitely pick aubergine, it will be so wonderful in all your pictures!”
Touché karma. Touché.